21 YEARS AGO

Twenty-one years ago today I became a father for the first time. 

We were living in Pensacola, Florida. It was a Saturday morning. (I didn't remember the day of the week, but you can find anything on Google.) We had entered the hospital Thursday morning for an 8 AM induction. 

Caleb arrived safely at 6 AM two days later. Yes, Melissa endured 46 hours of labor. What a woman!

Look at my face in this photo:

I don't look scared. 

I look delirious. (And a bit sleep-deprived.)

I remember going to church the next morning - I was the youth pastor at First United Methodist in downtown Pensacola. And I remember sitting in the front row before the service started.

The organ was playing and people were finding their seats and I had one of those spiritual moments where the mist of life clears and everything seems crystal clear.

At that point, I had been a Christian - as far as I could tell - all 33 years of my life. But I had often wondered why Christianity was always glorifying God the Father for sending his only Son to die in our place. By my reasoning, sending was the easy part - it was the Son who did all the suffering on our behalf, right?

But now - one day into fatherhood - a new appreciation for the sacrifice of the Father overwhelmed me. I thought of Caleb, who so far had done nothing more than eat, open his eyes, dirty his little diapers, and cry. But I knew that I would do anything in my power to spare him any pain, any hurt, any suffering for the rest of my life. 

But our heavenly father valued me enough to send his only Son to earth? Even knowing his Son would be spit on, ridiculed, and crucified? 

That is almost incomprehensible.

"For God so loved the world that He sent His only begotten Son ..."

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Happy Birthday, Caleb! It has been tough for your mom and me to watch you go through such trying circumstances in recent months and years, but you have proven to be tough and full of grace. Welcome to adulthood. You are one of greatest men I have known in my lifetime. 

And the best is yet to be!