I DO

Today I started writing about my upcoming baptism. I had hoped to post those thoughts here tonight but I am finding it rather difficult to write about. 

But that's good. Writing helps me figure out what I really think - and baptism is a serious topic deserving careful consideration. 

It feels like a big part of my difficulty is my hesitancy to stir up theological animosity. Baptism is a topic which conjures strong opinions. I sincerely do not want to offend others who hold views of baptism not aligned with my own. 

As a pastor now, it seems like I might find it tricky to get baptized out of my own personal conviction to obey what God is calling me to do, without it being interpreted as something I would dictate for the Church as a whole. 

In the end, this isn't about whether anybody who was baptized as a baby needs to be baptized as an adult. It is only about whether Steve Gross - who happened to be baptized as a baby - wants to be baptized as an adult. 

And I do. 

LACKING RESISTANCE

I heard a podcast this morning where the guest, Stephen Pressfield, was speaking on the topic of "Fear of Failure" - which I can identify with. 

And it made me want to reread his book, The War of Art.

That book is all about every human's battle against what Pressfield calls Resistance - that force which strives with all its might to keep men and women from doing the important things which they are created to do and from becoming the people they were meant to be. 

While listening this morning, I started thinking of some generally unpleasant scenarios which I find myself enjoying on some level:

• Cleaning the kitchen
• Getting snowed in
• Power outages
• And even being sick

And I realized something: the part I enjoy is the reprieve from wrestling with Resistance. For each scenario, I am off the hook, at least temporarily.

That's because nothing consequential can be accomplished when the dishes need attention or when I can't leave the house or when I have no electricity or when I'm flat on my back with a fever. The lack of the opportunity to progress on something of value means Resistance has nothing to oppose.

And so the mind goes quiet for a time. 

That is such a pleasant change that it is almost worth having the flu for.

As a man of faith, the following question occurs to me: Is a similar escape from Resistance something a proper Sabbath could bring about?

BETRAYAL AND DENIAL

This week in my sermon preparation I am studying the tail end of John 13 in the lead up to Easter at the end of March.

What I find interesting here is that within a dozen verses, Jesus addresses Judas' betrayal as well as Peter's denial. Jesus tells Judas, "What you are about to do, do quickly"(v.27). And to Peter He says, "Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times" (v.38). 

How tragic! Jesus is facing His own impending death and yet His companions - His students - His friends - are proving to be less than supportive. In fact, they are adding to His grief and suffering long before the nails are driven through His flesh. 

In this passage, the betrayal and the denial have some commonalities:

• Both are done in secret - and yet Jesus knows.
• Both cause Jesus pain.
• Both entail a rejection of Jesus and a separation from Him. 

But there must be major differences as well. Clearly, the betrayal is the greater sin. Jesus does not announce at supper, "One of you is going to disown me". 

Also, the separation of betrayal becomes permanent (and deadly) while the separation of denial turns out to be temporary (by God's grace).

I am just starting to grapple with this, but it seems to me that at the core, the major difference between these two failings is that the betrayal revealed a truth: Judas had not been on board with Jesus for some time and now he was making it official. 

The denial, on the other hand, involved hiding a truth: Peter did know and love Jesus, but contradicted that reality out of fear. 

Have you ever wondered if Judas would have found forgiveness if he had not rashly taken his own life out of guilt and shame? 

I need to reflect more on this, but it seems to me that betrayal is on an entirely different level from denial. 

Peter's denial was a sin - and he later found forgiveness. 

Judas' betrayal was more than a sin. It was an abandonment of Jesus as the Christ. 

PREJUDICE AND CONFIRMATION BIAS

The psychological phenomenon of "confirmation bias" is defined as "the tendency to interpret new evidence as confirmation of one's existing beliefs or theories" (Oxford).

It is something we all experience on a daily basis. It doesn't have to do with intelligence or morality. It is just a fact of human psychology. 

Confirmation bias is the reason we are all convinced that we always get in the slowest line at the grocery store check-out. We forget all the times we paid for our eggs and left relatively quickly and recall only the long waits that confirm our suspicion that we are forever picking the wrong line. 

It seems to me that it is confirmation bias - made toxic by human sinfulness - at play in prejudice and racism. 

When seen in this light, it is clear that prejudice is ...

• The result of a fundamental misinterpretation of reality. (Overvaluing certain pieces of "evidence" while undervaluing others.)
• Something to which every human being is susceptible. (It doesn't belong to any particular skin color or culture.)
• And, unfortunately, something which will always be with us. (Like "the poor".)

None of which is to say that it cannot or should not be confronted and countered. 

PREJUDICE

My dad owned and managed a hardware store. Outside of stocking shelves and ordering merchandise, a good chunk of his time each day was spent chit-chatting with customers. Dad was generally well-liked and greatly respected, so these conversations often strayed beyond water heaters and sanding paper. 

One day Dad came home from work shaking his head over a particularly puzzling interchange. This would have been the early 1980s, I suppose.

A customer had expressed apprehension over rumors of a new Toyota factory coming to Shelbyville. "I don't like the idea one bit," the man groaned. "I don't think it's good to have foreign-owned businesses in town."

Dad, level-headed and thoughtful, was quick to reply: "Well, what about the fiberglass company -  Knauf? They've been here for years and they're German-owned."

The customer was having none of it: "This is completely different. Toyota is owned by the Japanese."

Dad was confused. "So what's the difference? Knauf is German and Toyota is Japanese."

"It's totally different," the man explained. "The Japanese fought against us in World War II!" 

😏

That's what you might call tragicomedy. 

That conversation stuck with me - I suppose because it demonstrated important truths about this sinful inclination of the human heart towards prejudice.

    First, prejudice is not rational. 

    Second, prejudice is highly selective.

    Third, for the sake of holding onto a particular prejudice, it's a whole lot easier when "they" look physically different from "us". 

CONFIDENCE MISPLACED

Of all the ugliness which the fall of mankind unleashed on the human spirit, it could be argued the drive to elevate one's self by pushing down others is unsurpassed in shamefulness.

Is it brought on by our awareness of continually falling short ourselves of the glory which could have - and should have - been ours? Is it an attempt to distract the world from our own shortcomings by redirecting attention toward those who are "beneath" us?

Whatever brings it on, sinful man relishes having someone to look down on!

And it's all relative.

I remember high school basketball games. Whenever we - the Shelbyville Golden Bears - would travel to little Morristown for a game, we loved to mock the Yellow Jackets as a bunch of hicks and hayseeds. But if we were lucky enough to make the sectionals, the Indianapolis teams would call us a bunch of hicks and hayseeds.

Sometimes we really have to stretch and use our imagination to find a scorn-worthy characteristic in another.  

I know of a man in South Dakota, living among a population of townsfolk largely descended from German immigrants to the U.S. He married a woman of German descent whose mother never liked him. She carried an unspoken grudge for decades.

One day, the mother-in-law was old and on her deathbed and her daughter worked up the courage to ask her, "Why have you never liked my husband?"

The mother replied, "Well ... you know!"

"No, mom, I don't."

Exasperated, the woman explained, "He's one of those Russian Germans!" 

And it was true - this man's family lineage, though German through and through, had immigrated to Russia for a generation or two before continuing on to the United States!

This tendency of sinful man to look down his nose at others was serious enough to be called out by Jesus directly. In 18:9-14 of his Gospel, Luke records the following:

9 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable: 10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

13 “But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

14 “I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.”

God knows exactly what's going on in our hearts. Whenever we look down on others, it is a blatant demonstration of a confidence which is truly misplaced. 

TRUE NOBILITY

“There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow men. True nobility lies in being superior to your former self.” – Ernest Hemingway

And there is definitely nothing noble in believing yourself superior to anybody - but we sure do it a lot, don't we?

We see this pride in other people, but it's hard to imagine in ourselves. (Which is ironically fitting.)

When Jesus washed His disciples' feet, He threw them for a psychological loop. Foot washing was necessary, but base and ugly - and fit only for a servant. Yet this dirty job was beneath even the average Jewish slave. It was a task fitting only for the lowliest of servants - a foreign slave. 

It was not a job for a master or a rabbi or the Son of God. 

But here was Jesus, with a basin of water and a towel, throwing the social order into confusion. 

And then, the cherry on top: He told the disciples they were to continue washing each other's feet! This changed everything.

How are we supposed to figure out the pecking order if everyone is washing each other's feet all the time?

It seems that if you are following Jesus, there is only one person to whom you are justified in feeling superior. 

Your former self. 

BIG NEWS FOR MISSION RESOURCE

Tonight I am simply reposting an important development at Mission Resource. This has me excited! Here it is: This is BIG NEWS… We are excited to announce a NEW WORK for Mission Resource in Ghana which we are calling “The Empowerment Fund”. Some time ago we came across a thriving savings and loan ministry in Ghana which had been started by a good friend of ours. In recent years, although the ministry had continued to be successful, its sponsoring agency decided to pull away. Without the Lord’s intervention, the ministry was set to dry up - And hundreds of men and women would lose access to life-changing financial resources! It was clear to us at Mission Resource that the director, a Ghanaian named Eric Awortwe, was a talented and dedicated man, “with a head for business and a heart for Jesus”, as we like to say. Under his leadership, the program was meeting the financial needs of individuals in remote villages outside of Cape Coast, a couple of hours drive west of where most of Mission Resource’s work has taken place previously.

Mission Resource is excited to preserve this ministry, setting Eric and his team up for continued growth as together we serve budding business men and women around Cape Coast in Christ’s name. Although The Empowerment Fund is different from our established model in significant ways, its approach has been highly effective in its local context. We will share more about its distinctives in the coming months!

THE REWARDS OF BIBLE STUDY

There are great rewards for studying Scripture.

In Psalm 19:7, King David records two biggies: "The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple."

Reviving the Soul - God's word is like cold, clear water handed to a man lost in the desert. It's a second lease on life for the soul.

Making Wise the Simple - As we continue in God's word, even the dullest among us gains more and more wisdom. And wisdom is something that compounds. 

Unfortunately, neither reward is immediate.

But if we truly understood the magnitude of these two rewards of spending time in the Bible, we could muster the patience. 

DO WE HAVE AN EXCUSE?

Here are some of the most common passages cited in support of the "perspicuity" of Scripture - the fact that you don't need an advanced degree to "get" the Bible: 

Deuteronomy 6:6-7

6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.

- These commands are directed at the average Israelite, not just the priests. And apparently, the word of God is clear enough that even a child can understand - or there would be no point in God commanding the adults to share Scripture with their children.

2 Timothy 3:14-15a

14 But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it 15 and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.

- Timothy gained much from early exposure to the Scriptures. And the wonderful thing about Scripture is that it leads us into greater wisdom as we continue to read. 

Psalm 19:7

7 The law of the LORD is perfect, reviving the soul; the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.

- Even "the simple" have much to gain from Scripture.

Psalm 119:130

130 The unfolding of your words gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple.

- God's word unfolds as we read, giving light and understanding - again - even to the simple.

Looks like if we continuously fail to read the Bible regularly on our own time, these verses take "It's just too hard to understand" off the table of valid excuses. 

We don't have to understand every last bit of the Bible to find eternal value in studying the parts we DO get. 

DO YOU NEED AN EXPERT TO HELP YOU HEAR GOD'S VOICE?

Across the American church, pastors and lay people alike seem to assume that Scripture is just too complicated for someone without a seminary degree.

Or at the very least, a devotional or curriculum written by someone with the degree. 

Sure, you can read it - but you're just going to be lost and confused.

Still, even though we don't really seem to believe it in practice, there is a term to describe the Bible's availability to all, degree or not: "Perspicuity". 

The "Doctrine of the Perspicuity of the Scriptures" is the belief that, although there are some things in the Bible that are tough to comprehend or interpret properly even with deep study, the basic messages of the Bible are clear to all, especially anything directly pertaining to salvation. 

The doctrine of perspicuity is foundational for my dissertation. I'm a believer. You can gain meaningful, life-changing direction from the pages of Scripture. 

In fact, the whole project will be pretty useless if it turns out that the ordinary guy or gal in the average church CAN'T understand the Bible without expert guidance and commentary.

I anticipate facing this hurdle: convincing people that they don't have to lean on the "experts" to hear God speak to them through Scripture. 

(In fact, turning to the experts as your default position is counter-productive to your spiritual health.)

HOW DO YOU DISCERN GOD'S VOICE?

A church member posed a question to me by text this evening that she thought would be an interesting topic for a Bible study:

How do I distinguish God's voice from my own? 

It's a very good question and one I have been wondering myself lately. 

For example, I am reading a book by a man who founded a ministry for women who have escaped from sex trafficking. 

Long before the Lord spoke to him about this new ministry, the author was learning to discern God's voice while serving as the pastor of a local church. 

He tells of having lunch at a restaurant when he felt the Holy Spirit whisper to him that a revival was going to break out at his church the coming Sunday.

His path home from the restaurant passed the house of a couple who had stopped attending his church regularly. As he approached their home, the Holy Spirit again "whispered" to him, this time telling him to stop and tell the couple that revival was coming. 

At first he drove past, convinced it was just his own voice, but as he continued down the road, he felt convicted and turned around.

The couple said they would be there!

And, yes, revival broke out by the end of the week.

It's a great story - but how does one know with certainty the difference between God's still small voice and his own random thoughts or wishful thinking? 

What do you say? What is your experience?

Are there Bible passages or stories that you believe address this issue?

GOD FEELS

John 11:35 - "Jesus wept" - grabs our attention not only because of its brevity, but also for the image of a God who mourns.

Although we know the Bible says "God is love", many believers conceive of God as being mainly cold and distant. Many have a hard time imagining God as experiencing any emotion outside of anger or disappointment.

But here is Jesus weeping before the tomb of His friend Lazarus.

And Hebrews 1:3 tells us that “The Son is the radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word.”  

The exact representation!

Jesus Himself said that when we see Him, we have seen the Father.

We may have to work hard to comprehend fully that God Himself is standing at the tomb, mourning with Lazarus' sisters.

It is curious to note that the Greek word used in verse 35 is not the same as the word used to describe the sisters' tears. Though they both end up as "weep" in English, the sisters' crying is what we might call "wailing" while Jesus is "shedding tears". 

I've heard people wonder why Jesus weeps here when He knows He is about to resurrect Lazarus.

It's a good question. 

A previous verse might shed some light. 

In verse 33, Jesus is said to be "deeply moved in spirit and troubled". 

The really interesting word is what the NIV translates as “deeply moved”. Strong’s says the Greek means “to snort like an angry horse.”

God in the flesh standing by the tomb of his friend snorting like an angry horse? Can you imagine?

He's obviously not angry at anyone else standing beside Him. What's He angry about?

I may be wrong, but it seems to me the tears and the anger are aimed in the same direction. 

Some believers hold a theology of a God who is disgusted by humanity, just itching to throw the whole lot into hell. (à la Jonathan Edwards and his famous sermon, "Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God")

Personally, I hold a theology of a God who is disgusted by sin because of the pain it has inflicted on His loved ones. 

Lazarus' resurrection is a foretaste of Jesus' ultimate solution to the sin problem, and in that moment Jesus exercises his power over death - just like in the moment of His own death to come - it is accomplished in a full and painful awareness of the reality of sin. 

TOO LATE?

In the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the dead (John 11), there's one thing that everyone seems to agree on regarding Lazarus' illness...

Martha says to Jesus, "If you had been here, my brother would not have died." (v.21)

Mary says the exact same thing to Jesus minutes later: "If you had been here, my brother would not have died." (v.32)

The Jews who were with the grieving sisters say to one another, "Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?" (v.37)

And Jesus says to his disciples: "Lazarus is dead, and for your sake I am glad I was not there, so that you may believe." (v.14,15)

There is universal agreement: "If only Jesus had been there, He could have healed Lazarus and prevented his death."

There is near universal agreement on another point: "Jesus SHOULD have healed Lazarus and prevented his death."

Jesus disagrees.

More importantly, He disagrees with Mary and Martha and the crowd on the implication of their complaint: 

"It's too late for Jesus to do anything now."

Jesus: "Hold my wine."

EMPOWERMENT

Mission Resource quietly worked this past year to rescue an existing microfinance ministry in Ghana from going out of business. 

It wasn't being discontinued because of poor performance - in fact, it was growing and doing incredible work. 

For some reason, though, the program's originating sponsor - a U.S. based mission agency - decided they wanted to put their attention elsewhere and pulled out. 

Mission Resource has been able to keep the doors open and retain the ministry's topnotch staff. It is now operating under the name of The Empowerment Fund and, with Mission Resource behind it, we are serving more than 500 additional individuals in Ghana. 

The Empowerment Fund will continue operating in the model that has worked for them for over ten years. Combining loans with a savings component and functioning in group settings, it is different from Mission Resource's long-established model.

But if it ain't broke, we aren't going to fix it.

The Director, Eric Awortwe, is an incredibly sharp guy with the perfect skill set to take The Empowerment Fund to the next level. 

It's an exciting new chapter for Mission Resource, but it also means we need to raise more funds than ever before!

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EDITED

Over the last few days, I have been gifted with two self-published books, one on fasting and the second a spiritual memoir.

Both were of sufficient interest to me that I did some reading, finishing the first and making good progress on the second.

Both are written with passion, insight, and wisdom.

Both are very engaging.

But neither author knew a good editor, apparently. 

One author seemed to have an excess of commas he was trying to use up. And he sprinkled typos everywhere - including two chapter titles.

The other author's work would have been greatly strengthened by removing 25% of his words. 

What a shame. 

I'm not sure how a person figures out how to write a book, format it, and publish it without learning the importance of a good editor. 

Seems like a key step!

An author needs a friend who is not afraid to say, "This could be better."

Heck, we all could use a friend like that. 

GIVING UP SOMETHING

Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday (as well as Valentines Day). 

For decades now I have practiced "giving up something for Lent" and I always find it a valuable exercise.

In studying up on fasting over the last few weeks, I came across a handful of Bible "experts" who looked down their noses at this practice as being "not a real fast". A true fast, they said, means eating no food and drinking nothing but water for 3, 7, 21 or 40 days. Not giving up soda for a few weeks. 

Certainly, giving up chocolate for 40 days is not as hardcore as going without food altogether for 40 days. Still, I think you can get a lot of the benefits of fasting and experience a miniature version of a fast by giving up something for Lent. 

The similarities include:

• The abstaining from a God-given good (like food in general or chocolate in particular) in pursuit of God's "even better"
• The enduring of temptations brought by bodily appetites
• The exercising of your self-control 
• The focusing on the spiritual over the physical
• The emphasizing of prayer

And those are not things to pooh-pooh!

The Church should be encouraging experiences of God, not belittling or dismissing them. 

Anytime we give up something to get more of God, it's a win. 

WHIPLASH

Today I listened to an recently filmed interview of John Piper, famous apologist for Calvinism via both pulpit and page. 

The title captured Piper's major thrust succinctly: "You Don't Plan Your Life". 

I'm not sure what the audience thought, but Piper's talk gives the perfect example of the contradiction inherent between two positions which Calvinism holds dear:

1) God decrees absolutely everything. Nothing happens - no action, thought, or word - apart from His will. 

And yet...

2) Humans have enough of a type of free will to be culpable for their actions and inactions.

Here's what I mean:

At the 7:00 mark, Piper tells the audience "the posture you're in right now is dictated by the Lord" so much so that if they have their legs crossed, it is "because God willed it 10 million years ago"! [Yes, he really says that.] 

Piper explains that this is "what we [as Calvinists] stand for", summing it up thus: "The all-pervasive sovereignty of God and His total governance of the world". 

By the 11:30 mark Piper summarizes: "You don't plan your life! Just get over it - you don't plan your life."

And it's at this point that you need to brace yourself if you are expecting coherence and consistency. 

As he continues, Piper induces theological whiplash: "So here's what the Lord wants from you ... He wants your flat out, 24/7 devotion to Him and His calling on holiness in your life." 

"He will guide you if your life is devoted to Him."

Say what now? How in the world does God both dictate my life and guide my life? What's my role in my own life again?

Incomprehensible gibberish. 

But neither the interviewer nor Piper's audience seems to notice. 

[You can watch this mess on YouTube HERE.]

TALK ABOUT COUNTER CULTURAL

The more I think about fasting, the more I wonder how importance the practice is to the "walking in the spirit" that the New Testament speaks so much about. 

If the flesh is the seat of all that wars against God and His will, and fasting is feeding our spirits while denying our flesh, then it is hard to avoid the conclusion that fasting is incredibly important to a life of "walking in the spirit". 

I do believe that fasting should be encouraged, if for no other reason than because it is biblical.

But perhaps fasting is all the more important in modern America - where we are overburdened with material plenty. Where stuff and food fill our lives. And where every desire - be it for food, entertainment, or pleasures of all kinds - is fanned into flames endlessly by Madison Avenue, with the promise of instant satisfaction.

We must never forget: "It is hard for the rich to enter the Kingdom of heaven."

Fasting may be the antidote American society needs. 

I shrink away from this conclusion, but only because fasting is such a neglected and resisted practice in this day and age.

How does one effectively promote a practice which is so thoroughly counter-cultural?

CELEBRITY

The story is told of a woman who happened to be a big sports fan who was in a small shop one day when she spots a rather large, athletic man. She thinks he looks familiar – like he’s some celebrity - but she can’t quite place him. Maybe he’s a professional football player. 

There’s only one other person in the shop, a “smaller weird-looking guy”, but this woman decides to saddle up beside him and ask, “Do you happen to know who the big, fit guy is over there?”

The small man answered, “Yes. That’s my bodyguard.”

The weird guy was Elton John.

The woman completely missed the true celebrity in the shop. 

You get the same feel from the story of Jesus’ transfiguration in Matthew 17.

When Peter sees Jesus in the company of the biggest celebrities of Israel’s history, Moses and Elijah, he wants to build three shelters to commemorate the moment.

It’s almost as if Peter is impressed that Jesus is in the same league as Moses and Elijah!

The voice of God clears up Peter’s mistaken valuation of the situation:

“This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased. Listen to him!”

It is Moses and Elijah who should be honored to be in Jesus’ presence, not the other way around. 

Peter, James, and John all drop in terror, face down on the ground. Peter must be thinking, “I’ve made the mother of all social faux pas!”

Jesus is way bigger, way more important than he had realized. 

It’s healthy to come to the same realization in our own lives sometimes!

And how does Jesus respond? 

He comes to where the three are lying trembling on the ground, and he touches them. What an incredible detail! And he simply says, “Get up. Do not be afraid.” 

My impression is that Jesus was not willing to waste time dwelling on their underestimation of him – he was already looking toward the job he had for them. 

These three would be soon laboring to build his Church. 

THE ROOSEVELT SOCIETY

Last week I heard that an old friend of mine named Eli has developed an online community devoted to "recovering historical masculinity". He calls it "The Roosevelt Society" after his role model for ultimate manliness, Teddy Roosevelt. 

I don't know how many guys he enrolls at a time, but it is filled and there is a waiting list.

I am dying to know what Eli is teaching. I plan to write him an email to see if he will give me a glimpse inside.

His website gives some clues to his approach  to the masculine ideal by setting up this interesting framework:

Eli says that for a guy, there is a need to "be a good man" but there is also the need to "be good at being a man". 

"Being a good man" means practicing virtues - being loving, just, charitable and such.

But "being good at being a man" involves things like taking risks, protecting your family, and providing for loved ones. 

Most everyone acknowledges that our present culture is a mess in a dozen different ways, but I have a growing suspicion that close to the center of our biggest issues lies the disintegration of both of these aspects of masculinity.

Unfortunately, from what I can see, the Church's response thus far has mostly consisted of handwringing, judgment, and resignation. 

I would like to see us be more proactive! 

My email to Eli is going to ask two questions:

1) What exactly are you teaching? 

And assuming it is good and worthwhile stuff ... (Eli is pretty darn sharp!)

2) Is there a way for it to be adapted for use in a faith setting where it could be spread to both adults and teens?

P.S. Although enrollment in Eli's program is currently closed, his landing page is worth a look, if you are interested. 

FASTING AFTERMATH

I woke up at 3:00 am and couldn't fall back to sleep. I don't know if that was fast-related or not. I do know that I was having breakfast by 4:30 - some strawberries, a fried egg and some toast.

Usually I am one to dump extra sugar on sliced strawberries, but this morning, seeing as how they were the first things I had eaten in 3 days, the strawberries were incredibly sweet without added sugar.

This is one of the benefits I have noticed with fasting - a day or two in and you start craving real food. Fruits and vegetables become a whole lot more appealing than Doritos. 

I tried to preserve that trend today, eating mostly veggies, some homemade bread and a little meat. I had two little pieces of leftover Christmas chocolate in the afternoon. The fast seems to have broken my addiction to sugar - at least temporarily. 

I began the morning at 186.2 lbs. and I end the day at 191.2! I am pretty sure I did not consume 5 lbs. of food today, so a portion of that must be my body reabsorbing water as well. 

I did find today that my fasting experience helped normalize hunger for me again. I am reminded that there is no danger of dying just because your stomach starts growling! Instead, I used hunger to remind me to drink water. 

The funny thing was that sometimes water seemed to be exactly what my stomach was after. Have I been mistaking thirst for hunger all this time?

Honestly - and I know I am not the only American for whom this is true - I can go weeks at a time without feeling any true hunger. 

That trend needs reversing.

All in all, the fast was not as difficult as I anticipated and proved to be a great way to reset my bodily appetites. I think it would be worth doing once a month just for the physical health benefits, let alone any spiritual benefits. 

FASTING DAY 3

My beginning weight this morning was 187.8. I ended at 187.2. On Day 1 I dropped 2.5 lbs during the day. On Day 2 only .8 lbs. And then today only .6 lbs. That says to me that most of the first day's weight loss was water. (You don't lose 2.5 lbs of fat in a day.) 

But here's a curious thing: I have been losing more weight over night than during the day. Almost 2 lbs each night. Again, that can't be all fat. 

I fully anticipate my weight to bounce back up once I end the fast tomorrow morning, but it will be interesting to see how big or small that bounce will be.

Today, two things really stood out:

1) I had more strength and energy than I typically do. 

Proof? Most mornings I try to get in a little 10 minute exercise routine - jumping jacks and sit ups and whatnot. This morning I was able to do more reps across the board than I have in a long time. Most notably, I was able to do 60  pushups this morning. Usually my limit is 53! That's substantial. 

2) These final hours have been the toughest. The hunger pains seem greater and there is a real temptation to break my fast earlier than I planned. I started rationalizing that I could start eating tonight around 11:00 pm because that was the time on Sunday that I last ate. 

But if I broke my fast tonight it would be disastrous. I know I would likely start eating and then keep eating - until I was miserable. 

Better to stick to my original intention and break the fast tomorrow morning with some fruit.  

FASTING DAY 2

On Day 2 of my 3 day fast: 

The hunger pains seemed a bit more muted but also more frequent. 

The biggest temptation was a huge raspberry filled donut that my boss brought into the office for me this morning. The funny thing was that it didn't tempt me too much at first sight. I had no problem bringing it back to the house to pass along to Sarah. 

The temptation kicked in when Sarah got home from school and stood in the kitchen eating that donut. Right in front of me. 

It was hard to watch. 

So much jelly! 

In the evening, Melissa and I watched an episode of This Is Us together and in nearly every scene the characters were eating. Melissa hadn't noticed how much food was in the episode until I pointed it out. 

The only other physical downside was that it felt like I had a little more trouble falling to sleep last night than normal, but it was nothing too terrible. 

On the bright side, it doesn't feel like going without food has dampened my energy. If anything, I feel a little more energetic in body and clearer in mind. And even though the dog woke me up at 4:30, I was able to fall back to sleep - which is unusual for me. Furthermore, I felt like my brain kicked into gear a little faster than normal after the alarm went off. 

For the record: my morning weight was 191.4 and I am ending the day at 189.6.

I don't mean to make fasting all about the physical experience. I had a good time of prayer this morning. And in lieu of lunch, I took the dog for a walk - allowing me extra time to think and pray. 

The physical experience of fasting is noteworthy because, whereas from day to day our bodies rule the roost, fasting prioritizes the spirit over the body. 

Bringing the body into submission. 

That is what's really interesting - and useful - about fasting. 

FASTING DAY 1

Some interest on the subject of fasting has been expressed recently in my church so I plan to make it the topic of our first Lenten Bible study - on Ash Wednesday next week. 

I have been fasting weekly for over two years and I believe it is a useful practice and spiritually beneficial even though my practice is not much more than skipping breakfast and delaying lunch until 3:00 pm. I have also done some intermittent fasting and I have "given up something for Lent" just about every year for decades now, but I don't know if I have fasted a full day since I was in seminary. 

Since I want to include information on strict biblical fasting in our study, I thought I would do a 3 day fast this week for the experience and for the sake of teaching. 

Here are some reflections on Day 1:

• Last night, though I wasn't very hungry, I knew I wouldn't be eating today and so I found myself binging almost uncontrollably. It started with relatively healthy food and ended with cookies and chocolate. I felt kinda gross afterward. 

• I decided that while I refrain from food I would also refrain from all drinks but water (because that seems more biblical). It was strange not starting the day with coffee, but I am not one who is addicted to caffeine so it was not a huge sacrifice. 

• So ... I drank much more water today than I typically do - and that has to be beneficial to my health.

• My weight this morning came in at 195.8, which is a little higher than my norm. Probably the result of binging last night and some extra water weight. I ended the day at 193.2, which is about my norm. 

• An evening trip to Aldi was a lot quicker than usual because I wasn't looking for anything for myself to snack on - I just stuck to the trash bags, dog treats, and bacon on my list. In and out.

• I was reminded today of two major trends in my daily approach to food: 1) I eat often and 2) I mostly eat to entertain my taste buds, not to nourish my body. 

• Hunger pangs were not a major issue. They come and go - and they remind me to drink water. I had a bit of a headache in the afternoon, but that might be due to disrupted sleep patterns over the last few nights. 

We will see how tomorrow goes.

WIND

Jesus said a lot of enigmatic things in His day. I have always assumed His goal was at least two-fold: to arouse curiosity and to dissuade His followers from thinking all truth could be conveyed in curt propositions. 

I was thinking this morning about Jesus telling Nicodemus that he needed to be "born again" (or perhaps "born from above") and how it is the Spirit that gives birth to spirit.

Maybe it's just my own hang up or a longstanding misreading on my part, but I have always been puzzled by Jesus' next assertion in particular:

"The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit.” (John 3:8)

What has always thrown me about this is the fact that, strictly speaking, you can tell where the wind is coming from and where it is going. 

All you need is a weather vane or a flag. (For that matter, you can simply lick your finger and then lift it in the air.) 

So I realized this morning that Jesus can't be talking about the direction of the wind's movement.  

I think maybe the meaning is better understood as "you cannot tell where the wind originates or where it will end". (This might have always seemed obvious to you, but it's a new thought for me.)

And maybe this is a stretch - and maybe it's not what Jesus meant at all - but I have found the following to be true: 

I cannot pinpoint where the Holy Spirit started working in my life. 

And I have no idea where the Spirit is taking me.

But there is a distinct sound right now and I know He is at work.

And for the record, I am open to the wind picking up.

IN CONCERT

Tonight I accompanied 8 youth from our church to catch the Indianapolis show of Winter Jam, a big annual Christian concert tour.

I have never been a huge fan of Christian music - for my own reasons - and tonight didn't win me over.

One of my issues with Christian artists in concert has always been the inconsistency of singing about pointing others toward faith in Christ while peacocking around a stage in front of thousands of adoring fans. 

Here's a shot of Lecrae singing about humbly "standing in the background" as a Christian. 

Ironic.

Oh well. I am obviously not the demographic the Christian music industry is aiming at.

THE PRESENCE OF GOD

The preacher at our American Baptist pastors' retreat tonight spoke about the importance of experience in the life of our churches. He said it's what is missing from too many congregations.

He said we can have programs and preaching and head knowledge of God, but if we don't have His presence, something is completely off.

He spoke of sitting down to eat at a P.F. Chang's some time ago only to be told they were out of rice.

Later he stopped at an IHOP and ordered pancakes. But his waitress said the restaurant was out of syrup.

Not long after that, he walked up to the counter of a KFC and heard the cashier tell the customer in front of him that everything on the menu was available except chicken. They had run out.

This, the preacher explained, is what it's like to enter a church which doesn't enjoy God's presence.

It's like a Chinese restaurant without rice.

An IHOP without maple syrup.

A KFC without chicken.

It should not be possible, but it happens.

THE BEST YOU CAN DO

Some questions can be quite intimidating.

This anecdote related in a biography of Henry Kissinger by Walter Isaacson hits right between the eyes:

Kissinger once asked his special assistant, Winston Lord, to write a report. After days of effort, Lord submitted his work only to receive it back with this note: “Is this the best you can do?”

Lord immediately got back to work on the report, revising it from start to finish, but upon receiving the thing, Kissinger wrote again, “Is this the best you can do?”

Lord made another effort to perfect the report, but once again it was returned to him with the same question: “Is this the best you can do?”

At this Lord exploded. He confronted Kissinger angrily, cursing and proclaiming, “YES, it’s the best I can do!”

Kissinger took the report and said, “Fine, then I guess I’ll read it this time.”

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.  - Col 3:23-24